Our Original Crystal-Infused CBD Blend

Meet the OG. The one that started it all. 💚✨

Kryptonite™ was our very first crystal-infused CBD blend, created for those days when your muscles and joints are loudly informing you that apparently existing was enough activity for one lifetime. 😂

And unlike topical blends loaded with strong fragrances, Kryptonite™ was intentionally created without added fragrance, making it perfect when you want your topical routine to mind its own damn business. No perfume cloud announcing your arrival. Just apply it and carry on. 🙌

🌿 A POWERHOUSE BOTANICAL BLEND

Kryptonite™ combines hemp-derived CBD with a carefully selected blend of botanical ingredients traditionally used in topical wellness preparations, including:

🌿 Arnica
🌿 Juniper Berry
🌼 Helichrysum
💚 Hemp Seed Oil
🌱 Hemp-Derived CBD

Our salve varieties also contain rich, skin-loving:

✨ Shea Butter
✨ Cocoa Butter
✨ Beeswax

But because we're The Pretty Hot Mess and apparently simply making CBD products wasn't extra enough...

We infused Kryptonite™ with Natural Black Tourmaline Crystals. 🖤🔮

✨ WHY BLACK TOURMALINE?

In crystal and metaphysical traditions, Black Tourmaline is associated with grounding, protection, energetic cleansing, balance, and releasing unwanted energy.

We infuse Kryptonite™ with Black Tourmaline as part of our intentional creation process, bringing together our love of plant-based wellness and crystal energy in one seriously badass little product. 🖤✨

Crystal properties are based on traditional and metaphysical practices and are not scientifically established medical effects.

💚 CHOOSE YOUR KRYPTONITE™

Available in several sizes and application styles so you can choose whatever works best for you:

✨ 10 mL Roller Ball
Perfect for precise application, smaller areas, purses, travel bags, desks, and keeping your Kryptonite close when you're on the go.

✨ 2 oz Twist-Up
No digging into a jar required. Twist it up, glide it where you want it, and get on with your day.

✨ 4 oz Salve
Our classic size for regular home use and larger application areas.

✨ 8 oz Salve
For the people who already know they're not screwing around. 😂💚

🖤 HOW TO USE

Apply a small amount to the desired area and massage into the skin.

May be applied 2 to 3 times daily as needed.

✨ Start with a small amount.
✨ Massage thoroughly into the skin.
✨ Wash hands after application unless treating the hands.
✨ Always patch test on a small area before wider use.

For external use only. Human use only. Do not ingest. Avoid contact with eyes, mouth, mucous membranes, and broken or irritated skin. Discontinue use if irritation occurs. Keep out of reach of children and pets.

🌿 INGREDIENTS

Salve:
Juniperus communis L. (Juniper Berry), Helichrysum stoechas (Helichrysum), Arnica montana (Arnica), Cannabis sativa L. (Hemp-Derived CBD), Cera Alba (Beeswax), Vitellaria paradoxa (Shea Butter), Hemp Seed Oil, Theobroma Cacao (Cocoa Butter).

Infused with Natural Black Tourmaline Crystals.

Roller Ball:
Juniperus communis L. (Juniper Berry), Helichrysum stoechas (Helichrysum), Arnica montana (Arnica), Cannabis sativa L. (Hemp-Derived CBD), Hemp Seed Oil.

Infused with Natural Black Tourmaline Crystals.

💬 FROM ONE OF OUR ORIGINAL BETA TESTERS

“I am 66 years old and have suffered from painful, debilitating, and sometimes even immobilizing back pain for years. I tried many prescription medications that the doctor prescribed to me, and began experiencing horrible side effects. The results with your Kryptonite are amazing! I love it and my back thanks you.”

Individual experiences vary. Customer testimonials describe individual experiences and are not a guarantee of results.

💚 THE PHM ORIGINAL

Kryptonite™ wasn't created because the world needed another boring topical sitting on a shelf.

It was our first crystal-infused CBD blend, combining botanicals, hemp-derived CBD, intentional formulation, and Black Tourmaline into something unmistakably PHM. 🖤🔮🌿

Years later, it's still a favorite.

Because when you've found your Kryptonite... apparently you buy the 8 oz jar. 😂💚

⚠️ IMPORTANT INFORMATION

For external use only. Human use only. Do not ingest. Avoid eyes, mouth, mucous membranes, and broken or irritated skin. Patch test before use. Discontinue use if irritation or sensitivity occurs. Keep out of reach of children and pets. Consult a qualified healthcare professional before use if pregnant, nursing, taking medication, or if you have questions about whether this product is appropriate for you.

FDA DISCLAIMER:
These statements have not been evaluated by the Food and Drug Administration. This product is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease.

Price is for a single product unless otherwise disclosed. Additional photos in product pictures are for display purposes only and are not included.

Available in 10ml roller ball,  2oz twist up, 4oz salve 8 oz salve

Apply to painful areas 2-3 times a day. Always test on a small area before applying to a larger area incase of allergic reaction. For external use only. Keep away from eyes. Human use only.

Salve: Juniperus communis L. (Juniper Berry), Helichrysum stoechas (Helichrysum), Arnica montana (Arnica), Cannabis sativa L (Hemp Derived CBD Oil), cera alba (Beeswax), Vitellaria paradoxa (Shea Butter), Hemp Seed Oil, Theobroma Cocoa (Cocoa Butter) *Infused with Natural Black Tourmaline Crystals

Roller Ball: Juniperus communis L. (Juniper Berry), Helichrysum stoechas (Helichrysum), Arnica montana (Arnica), Cannabis sativa L (Hemp Derived CBD Oil), Hemp Seed Oil *Infused with Natural Black Tourmaline Crystals

Beta Tester Statement

“I am 66 years old and have suffered from painful, debilitating, and sometimes even immobilizing back pain for years. I tried many prescription medications that the doctor prescribed to me, and began experiencing horrible side effects. The results with your kryptonite is amazing! I love it and my back thanks you" 

‡Statements about products on this website have not been evaluated by the Food and Drug Administration. These products are not intended to diagnose, treat, cure or prevent any disease. Always check with your doctor before using natural supplements. Keep out of reach of children. Do not use on children <2 years old. Do not ingest.  

Disclaimer: The Pretty Hot Mess will not be held responsible for any claims or testimonials regarding medical efficacy of any of our products. The FDA (Food and Drug Administration) has not evaluated any of these statements, nor have the claims been confirmed by FDA-acknowledged research. Neither our staff nor our products are intended to diagnose, cure, prevent, or treat any disease or medical condition. Please consult your physician before including any of our products in your wellness plan.

This product has not been evaluated by the FDA. It is not intended to treat, cure, diagnose or prevent any disease.

Please Note:

This product is not for use by or sale to persons under the age of 21. ID Verification is required.

Products on this site contain a value of 0.3% or less Δ9 (or no more than 0.3% Δ9).

Caution: Do not use the product while operating a vehicle or heavy machinery. Use responsibly. Do not use if pregnant or nursing or if you have any diagnosed or undiagnosed health conditions. Do not use these products while taking any prescription or non-prescription drugs without consulting with your health care provider. Do not use with alcohol or any other drugs. Keep away from children. 

The Manufacturer and The Pretty Hot Mess, LLC cannot be held responsible, nor assume responsibility for any individual who consumes or misuses this product.This product should be used only as directed on the label or by your health care provider. This product is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure or prevent any disease. 

Certificate of Analysis

Please see additional Product Disclaimer Here

Customer Reviews

Based on 4 reviews
100%
(4)
0%
(0)
0%
(0)
0%
(0)
0%
(0)
M
Madonna Kearney
LIFESAVER

I have suffered w back pain since a accident at 19 now 60 this stuff is a lifesaver for sure...

L
L.V.
Miracle effects!

My husband swears by the effects of this product for his post surgical back pain

S
Susan M.
Joint juice

I was sketchy at 1st but I got one and I'm impressed I will order again

S
Susan Marie DUBEE
Joint juice

I was sketchy at 1st but I got one and I'm impressed I will order again

LOL We are so glad you love it and know that we are not sketchy

Please Note:
Some of our product photos may display multiple items to showcase natural variations in color, shape, or size—especially for items like crystals or stones. However, the listed price is for one (1) individual item, unless otherwise clearly stated in the product description.

We use group photos to help you see the variety you may receive, but unless the listing specifically mentions a set or bundle, your purchase will include a single item.

If you have any questions before purchasing, feel free to reach out—we're always happy to help!

🖤 KRYPTONITE | Tourmaline Infused CBD Pain Blend 🖤

Regular price $27.99
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Availability
 
Shipping calculated at checkout.

Our Original Crystal-Infused CBD Blend

Meet the OG. The one that started it all. 💚✨

Kryptonite™ was our very first crystal-infused CBD blend, created for those days when your muscles and joints are loudly informing you that apparently existing was enough activity for one lifetime. 😂

And unlike topical blends loaded with strong fragrances, Kryptonite™ was intentionally created without added fragrance, making it perfect when you want your topical routine to mind its own damn business. No perfume cloud announcing your arrival. Just apply it and carry on. 🙌

🌿 A POWERHOUSE BOTANICAL BLEND

Kryptonite™ combines hemp-derived CBD with a carefully selected blend of botanical ingredients traditionally used in topical wellness preparations, including:

🌿 Arnica
🌿 Juniper Berry
🌼 Helichrysum
💚 Hemp Seed Oil
🌱 Hemp-Derived CBD

Our salve varieties also contain rich, skin-loving:

✨ Shea Butter
✨ Cocoa Butter
✨ Beeswax

But because we're The Pretty Hot Mess and apparently simply making CBD products wasn't extra enough...

We infused Kryptonite™ with Natural Black Tourmaline Crystals. 🖤🔮

✨ WHY BLACK TOURMALINE?

In crystal and metaphysical traditions, Black Tourmaline is associated with grounding, protection, energetic cleansing, balance, and releasing unwanted energy.

We infuse Kryptonite™ with Black Tourmaline as part of our intentional creation process, bringing together our love of plant-based wellness and crystal energy in one seriously badass little product. 🖤✨

Crystal properties are based on traditional and metaphysical practices and are not scientifically established medical effects.

💚 CHOOSE YOUR KRYPTONITE™

Available in several sizes and application styles so you can choose whatever works best for you:

✨ 10 mL Roller Ball
Perfect for precise application, smaller areas, purses, travel bags, desks, and keeping your Kryptonite close when you're on the go.

✨ 2 oz Twist-Up
No digging into a jar required. Twist it up, glide it where you want it, and get on with your day.

✨ 4 oz Salve
Our classic size for regular home use and larger application areas.

✨ 8 oz Salve
For the people who already know they're not screwing around. 😂💚

🖤 HOW TO USE

Apply a small amount to the desired area and massage into the skin.

May be applied 2 to 3 times daily as needed.

✨ Start with a small amount.
✨ Massage thoroughly into the skin.
✨ Wash hands after application unless treating the hands.
✨ Always patch test on a small area before wider use.

For external use only. Human use only. Do not ingest. Avoid contact with eyes, mouth, mucous membranes, and broken or irritated skin. Discontinue use if irritation occurs. Keep out of reach of children and pets.

🌿 INGREDIENTS

Salve:
Juniperus communis L. (Juniper Berry), Helichrysum stoechas (Helichrysum), Arnica montana (Arnica), Cannabis sativa L. (Hemp-Derived CBD), Cera Alba (Beeswax), Vitellaria paradoxa (Shea Butter), Hemp Seed Oil, Theobroma Cacao (Cocoa Butter).

Infused with Natural Black Tourmaline Crystals.

Roller Ball:
Juniperus communis L. (Juniper Berry), Helichrysum stoechas (Helichrysum), Arnica montana (Arnica), Cannabis sativa L. (Hemp-Derived CBD), Hemp Seed Oil.

Infused with Natural Black Tourmaline Crystals.

💬 FROM ONE OF OUR ORIGINAL BETA TESTERS

“I am 66 years old and have suffered from painful, debilitating, and sometimes even immobilizing back pain for years. I tried many prescription medications that the doctor prescribed to me, and began experiencing horrible side effects. The results with your Kryptonite are amazing! I love it and my back thanks you.”

Individual experiences vary. Customer testimonials describe individual experiences and are not a guarantee of results.

💚 THE PHM ORIGINAL

Kryptonite™ wasn't created because the world needed another boring topical sitting on a shelf.

It was our first crystal-infused CBD blend, combining botanicals, hemp-derived CBD, intentional formulation, and Black Tourmaline into something unmistakably PHM. 🖤🔮🌿

Years later, it's still a favorite.

Because when you've found your Kryptonite... apparently you buy the 8 oz jar. 😂💚

⚠️ IMPORTANT INFORMATION

For external use only. Human use only. Do not ingest. Avoid eyes, mouth, mucous membranes, and broken or irritated skin. Patch test before use. Discontinue use if irritation or sensitivity occurs. Keep out of reach of children and pets. Consult a qualified healthcare professional before use if pregnant, nursing, taking medication, or if you have questions about whether this product is appropriate for you.

FDA DISCLAIMER:
These statements have not been evaluated by the Food and Drug Administration. This product is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease.

Price is for a single product unless otherwise disclosed. Additional photos in product pictures are for display purposes only and are not included.

Available in 10ml roller ball,  2oz twist up, 4oz salve 8 oz salve

Apply to painful areas 2-3 times a day. Always test on a small area before applying to a larger area incase of allergic reaction. For external use only. Keep away from eyes. Human use only.

Salve: Juniperus communis L. (Juniper Berry), Helichrysum stoechas (Helichrysum), Arnica montana (Arnica), Cannabis sativa L (Hemp Derived CBD Oil), cera alba (Beeswax), Vitellaria paradoxa (Shea Butter), Hemp Seed Oil, Theobroma Cocoa (Cocoa Butter) *Infused with Natural Black Tourmaline Crystals

Roller Ball: Juniperus communis L. (Juniper Berry), Helichrysum stoechas (Helichrysum), Arnica montana (Arnica), Cannabis sativa L (Hemp Derived CBD Oil), Hemp Seed Oil *Infused with Natural Black Tourmaline Crystals

Beta Tester Statement

“I am 66 years old and have suffered from painful, debilitating, and sometimes even immobilizing back pain for years. I tried many prescription medications that the doctor prescribed to me, and began experiencing horrible side effects. The results with your kryptonite is amazing! I love it and my back thanks you" 

‡Statements about products on this website have not been evaluated by the Food and Drug Administration. These products are not intended to diagnose, treat, cure or prevent any disease. Always check with your doctor before using natural supplements. Keep out of reach of children. Do not use on children <2 years old. Do not ingest.  

Disclaimer: The Pretty Hot Mess will not be held responsible for any claims or testimonials regarding medical efficacy of any of our products. The FDA (Food and Drug Administration) has not evaluated any of these statements, nor have the claims been confirmed by FDA-acknowledged research. Neither our staff nor our products are intended to diagnose, cure, prevent, or treat any disease or medical condition. Please consult your physician before including any of our products in your wellness plan.

This product has not been evaluated by the FDA. It is not intended to treat, cure, diagnose or prevent any disease.

Please Note:

This product is not for use by or sale to persons under the age of 21. ID Verification is required.

Products on this site contain a value of 0.3% or less Δ9 (or no more than 0.3% Δ9).

Caution: Do not use the product while operating a vehicle or heavy machinery. Use responsibly. Do not use if pregnant or nursing or if you have any diagnosed or undiagnosed health conditions. Do not use these products while taking any prescription or non-prescription drugs without consulting with your health care provider. Do not use with alcohol or any other drugs. Keep away from children. 

The Manufacturer and The Pretty Hot Mess, LLC cannot be held responsible, nor assume responsibility for any individual who consumes or misuses this product.This product should be used only as directed on the label or by your health care provider. This product is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure or prevent any disease. 

Certificate of Analysis

Please see additional Product Disclaimer Here

Customer Reviews

Based on 4 reviews
100%
(4)
0%
(0)
0%
(0)
0%
(0)
0%
(0)
M
Madonna Kearney
LIFESAVER

I have suffered w back pain since a accident at 19 now 60 this stuff is a lifesaver for sure...

L
L.V.
Miracle effects!

My husband swears by the effects of this product for his post surgical back pain

S
Susan M.
Joint juice

I was sketchy at 1st but I got one and I'm impressed I will order again

S
Susan Marie DUBEE
Joint juice

I was sketchy at 1st but I got one and I'm impressed I will order again

LOL We are so glad you love it and know that we are not sketchy

Please Note:
Some of our product photos may display multiple items to showcase natural variations in color, shape, or size—especially for items like crystals or stones. However, the listed price is for one (1) individual item, unless otherwise clearly stated in the product description.

We use group photos to help you see the variety you may receive, but unless the listing specifically mentions a set or bundle, your purchase will include a single item.

If you have any questions before purchasing, feel free to reach out—we're always happy to help!

App section